Dealing With Rejection (Except I'm a Sagittarius Who Gets Over Things Abnormally Fast)

Hey everyone, welcome back to my blog!! I hope you have all had a good week, mine has been questionable and confusing to say the least (but when is it not?) I am currently sitting on my bed writing this at 10:15pm so forgive me for low quality writing, unfortunately, you're stuck with this until my A-Levels are over. Speaking of A-Levels, I got an email last Friday from my top choice university! I got rejected. It's what inspired me to write this post because I managed to get over it oddly fast despite it being one of my biggest dreams. I hope you enjoy!

As mentioned above, I got rejected from my top choice university. I had worked harder for this opportunity than I have for anything in my life, and that's not even an over exaggeration. I think one of the reasons I got over it quite fast is because it is the top university in the country and one of the best in the world to study philosophy at. Many people get rejected, it doesn't mean they're stupid or incapable, we're just not what they're looking for. You can't be everyone's cup of tea at the end of the day.

Don't get me wrong, I cried when I saw the email. I had my moping around session in bed and it was a harsh knock to my confidence. I really thought I was a failure and thought it was going to be the end of the world. To be honest, as a teenage girl, I often think that it's going to be the end of the world so I wasn't really surprised at the reaction. After like an hour of being sad, I realised that actually, I've been through many situations like this before. Maybe not rejection, but things just not working out the way I wanted. Despite things not going as expected, my life has been pretty ok. I mean, sure I complain about school and get sad over how fictional men don't exist, only real men do, but those things are small things everyone complains about. Aside from that, I have had amazing chances to do the things I love which I am forever grateful for.

In fact, I faced this exact same situation exactly seven years ago when I took exams to get into a secondary school. I worked incredibly hard to get into one of the top schools. I prepared really hard, sat the exam and then found out that I didn't get in. I was absolutely devastated, at the age of eleven I really thought that was the end of the world. Little did I know, in the long scheme of things, the school I ended up going to was indeed the number one independent school in the country at the time, it just didn't have the same level of prestige or long term reputation. Nevertheless, I have thoroughly enjoyed the time I have spent so far at my school and wouldn't trade it for any other experience. I have managed to study subjects which weren't even offered at the other school like food and nutrition, textiles and astronomy. I have also managed to play multiple sports to county, district and national levels which I wouldn't have been able to do at the other school. I know I put on this super mature front but, I do enjoy being a bit petty at times and find that I am extra happy every time we beat that school in lacrosse matches. The only really good thing about it was the academics and the name of the school which would have been a slight benefit, but I'm all about experiences, who cares about a name being written on my CV?

When I got my rejection email and after I was upset for a bit (because even though I'm a Sagittarius, I'm still human) I started accepting that I wasn't going to go to that university. Although I am still not satisfied with the reason they rejected me, my 'academic profile' wasn't sufficient despite having top grades and having a personal statement which got me into other top class universities, I have kind of realised that I will be more than happy at one the other universities I applied to. Dare I say, I may even be happier at one of them than I would have been at the other university. 

I think the reasons I applied there weren't really the right reasons in the first place. Don't get me wrong, I loved the university when I saw it, but the course is quite deficient in comparison to others. They purely studied Western analytic philosophy. There's a reason nearly all Western philosophers went insane and eventually had to end it, my speculations are that they lacked the spiritual aspect of Eastern philosophy. Now, I will get to study a more holistic course I deeply enjoy as I will be able to do Eastern philosophy, particularly Indian schools of thought, alongside Western philosophy. I would also be able to keep up with my millions of extra-curricular activities and unhealthy amount of sports at any other university.

Maybe things really do work out for the best. I know things aren't really what I wanted at the moment, but I have faith that the universe has my back, it always has.

I hope you all enjoyed this post! I know there wasn't really much 'dealing' in this post, more just writing about how I cried for an hour and then got over it, but, I've been really confused on how I'm feeling lately and it's been nice to get a bit off my chest. See you all next week, love you guys <33